Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Stillness.


A slow music surrounded the atmosphere as the sun has its final encounters shimmering a bright red fragrance of an ending day in a very pleasant way. Everything was still. The people on the roads, the cars, the traffic, the clouds, the everything. The smoke from the chimney played with itself in the company of the wind that blew. I could even smell the sweet fragrance of the sweet flowers which were on the flower mart just couple of steps in front of. As I dissolved in the melody of the song, I was just as confused as the excitement that came with the unexpected turn of events. I kept walking savoring the plight of an unreasonable events that were happening just in front of my eyes. It was refreshing as I saw the still beauties all around me. The sun was welcoming night with open arms as the red magnificent reflection played a million compositions, but everything seemed still.

The track on the iPod changes to another delicacy. As I absorb the sweet nothingness in the quite atmosphere around me which still seems so strange yet beautiful. And I'm just in the moment at the right time, I told to myself just to assure myself that I am not one among the many still. What was happening was alien to me, but I tried to make the most of the stillness. There are the balloons that floated in the vast crimson sky as the shadows of innumerable objects stood in silence. All this felt quite strange. 

It was as if everything just stopped. I wondered whether I was dreaming or is it even real. The wind was blowing and as it touched me, a cool breeze which made me realize I wasn't dreaming. But this couldn't be possible, I told myself. I could see uncountable expressions on the people's faces. And there were a variety of people, of course. Working People, Professionals, Businessmen, Students. All carried with them a different unique sense of expression almost justifying their character and the work they were into. Angry, Happy, Sad, Confused, were the faces of the people who looked like mannequins in a Shopping Outlet, but with different human(y) expressions. Each distinct, yet significant.

There I was standing among the multitude of still people and frozen time. From my past experiences, it has always been opposite. I would be the one standing insensibly still and frozen among the myriad busy people moving along with their lives and with a steady plan, an inspiring goal and a never ending thrust of achieving the aim. It seemed odd and quite difficult for me to be on the opposite side of the coin. But among the infinitude stillness I too was still, with no plan, no goal, whatsoever. Was it a chance to get back to my senses and realize how deep I had fallen into the pit of emptiness? Or ... I just couldn't think anything clearer. I was just lost while I drowned into thinking and more thinking. 

I got into questioning myself and the situation that I am in. Life was at stillness right before my eyes. And I was having a hard time believing it. Then the questions increased. Was I dead? Or is this the transition. I had more question piling up in my mind. The time on my watch stood still as I bathed in the tub of piling suffocating questions. I was confused. I felt scared. I was drowning. The crimson sky and the pleasant atmosphere was no where to be seen. I was just surrounded by unanswered questions. I tried to swim against the tide and get to shore. But the more I tried, I more I sank. The previous stillness felt way much better. I told myself that it was just a dream or I am just hallucinating. All this can't be happening. The more I tried to kick the thought away, the more dearer it became. Life is a complicated mess. Whoever said "Life is Beautiful", I clearly don't know what he meant by that. Or may be it is beautiful for the people who could get out of this stillness and move on. So, I guess I just need to get out of this vast still swamp and get back on my feet before I get stuck here for eternity.

- Ajay Kontham 

P.S. Ok! Fine. I agree. I don't make any sense. What? Were you hoping to get a happy ending? Well, this ain't no Disney Story. Wait! I really don't make any sense at all. Omg! I better get out of here before these people (read : readers ) plan to avenge me. Damn. I am still stuck in this stillness. Oh Wait! I can't move. Come on legs-hands-body MOVE , MOVE. Damn! I am like that mannequin now. No. No. NoooOO! Somebody Help! 

12 comments:

  1. I guess you are so absorbed in an abstract state of mind, but I must tell you, you have written a damn good post of the abstract genre! :)

    Until later,
    Keirthana :)

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  2. Ooops ... now this was hard-hitting ... but well written :-)

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  3. Expresions and words: beautifully wowen..:)
    but seriously tell me are u dead???...:D
    JuSt KiDdiNg..
    Keep writing..:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank You. :)

      I guess so. I think I'm still in transition period. :P

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  4. Stillness sunk in myriad of questions pushing one to move on.:O
    Sometimes such things happen when we start wondering at the simplest of the facts. Loved the write-up. Kudos!
    Silly Smiles... Take you Miles :)

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  5. Superbly written I would say :)

    ReplyDelete

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