Wednesday, June 15, 2016

I bet you would.

This made me laugh, for obvious reasons of course. It is a straight forward question and so is the answer. Having said that, now you would be thinking what would you do, am I right? Now that we all are wondering what it would be like, let me point out this is a weekly prompt by #blogChatter and the purpose is to write a blog post on it. If I was any other person I pretend to be normally, I would just say "Yes" with a lot of attitude, of course, because attitude is 'rad' these days. Though I am not entirely sure what this rad means, no seriously what does it mean?

Took me for a socially challenged, didn't you. Cool and Radical, it means. Rad is so fab, ain't it? Anyhow. "Would you like you, if you met you?". I bet everyone would have thought about this at one point of time. If not, now is the time. How do you think the conversation would go? What would you like to talk about? What would you do? Would you be amazed? Would you be awestruck? Would you pick up your phone and speak even when it doesn't ring and get out of there? Or would you embark that day as the day of most awesome conversations? The questions just keep piling up, don't they?

I do that everyday, I mean talk, for your information. I talk to myself, I have never actually felt the need for another person. Because I can't talk. No, I can talk, but I can't talk, to people, to new people. So, the next logical question would be "Since you know yourself, you would obviously talk to yourself, I mean the other you in different clothes, obviously, otherwise it would be very really awkward, like twins, grown up twins walking around in same pair of dress. Give me a minute to erase that image out of my head. I accidentally used the permanent marker while picturing it. It is not rubbing off easily. Damn. So, would I? Would I like myself? Hell no. I don't need a fourth dimension character self of me to figure that out. I have a mirror, not the best in class but it sure as hell does work. And everyday's job is to get a new mirror hoping that someday it will show myself a little better, you know with square jaws, a little subtle, broad shoulders, blue eyes, ripped body, six packs duh! and an awesome hair duo.

So, you are saying that when you say "Would you like you, if you met you" with so many yous, you mean to say that whether you would like your character, whether you would like your inner self, the attitude, the real you. I think I got the question quite loud and clear. Knowing me, why would I ever want to meet me let alone like another me.

ακ, xᴠᴠɪᴍᴍxᴠɪ

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

P a u s e.

"Why haven't you written anything?" #askingForAFriend*

"Why haven't you written anything?", asked a friend. The reason is quite simple. I mean I am quite good at blaming, I always have been. So, this was not a difficult task. The culprit was "Writer's Block". You know they say there is no such thing as a Block or Writers' Block. It's just what people say. To justify that claim, I am no writer. So, telling everyone that I am on the crucial setback and am going to pounce back anytime now is just preposterous. How preposterous? Like those few people, who happened to be versatile bloggers writing almost every day and praising you that you are a good writer, but they haven't even visited your blog, yet keep on saying that they know how good of a writer you are and you listen to that, flattered, flustered and with a new found ambition to write more, only to realize that you deleted your blog a long time ago. Preposterous. You want a better example? I am sorry, that's all I have, I guess.

I have another friend, a girl. Now, for an introvert talking to a girl is kind of difficult. You wouldn't understand even if I tried to explain, you extrovert playboy philanthropist and some other cute six-packed words. So, for a conversation to break, one needs a common ground. Of course, you need to communicate in terms you understand or at least you pretend to understand. If a person was into rocket science, I could probably pretend, but when two neutrons hit each other, I am not sure what exactly happens. Nuclear reaction. Destruction. Yes, that is what I was searching for. Having said that it's a real shame that I can't even crack science being a science student. What if I told you I just did it to get out of school? Anyhow, I found the common ground. Blogging. Here, I could be a pretend artist, a freaking Picasso, I mean William Shakespeare. Damn, I should do my research in writing. 7 years into blogging and it looks like high school all over again, stuck in the same class. So, I get acquainted and become online friends, with no benefits. I know right, its' such a big bummer. Eventually, I would get a text at 3 AM asking for a push, since she is stuck at writing something. I look at myself, I have to go to another room since the mirror is there. I look at myself for a whole damn minute thinking when was the last time I wrote, do I even have a blog anymore and I realize never keep a lady waiting even though she never reads even one, I respond giving that motivating speech like the coach gives in the movies to the team in the final round. It's mostly gibberish but it has a great background score, the really motivating, hair raising one. I am not sure whether I have helped or not, I get cut off. I do try to followback by sending a few more messages. But damn, this friends with no benefits is such a drag, I tell you. And there's goes away my motivation. 

I have another blog. I have been fairly irregular. I have had it for a year, now. I don't have a reader base there, but I know a few people, like I do here. After reading a post, my intention is to leave a comment. Because writers and bloggers love comments. Its what keeps them motivated. If you don't know, try it. Leave a comment and see a positive impact on the person writing. That doesn't mean you have to leave a harsh and rude comment, but your opinion, positive or negative, just leave one. But I am amazed at the people leaving comments, mostly guys on girl's blog, which is nothing short of flirting. I haven't flirted or seen anyone in real, but I can just feel that itch in the throat, like that vomiting sensation, you know. Why? Because I have had my eye for quite some time and someone is applying a Tatkal. So, unfair. I even forget those lovely words I wanted to say to impress them. I just close the tab because that itch turned into a cough and I needed water.

I haven't written a single post in May of 2016. Do you know what the Blog stats say about my alleged visitors? As of today, 15000. That's like thrice of what I used to get when I wrote for the whole freaking month. I see that there is something terrible wrong with my blog. I have been trying to delete, move, customize and host it. But as the president of "The Procrastinators Elite", I just couldn't get work done, I had to postpone, like I am now. And that adds to the demotivating factor, finally making me unfit for writing.

"Why haven't you written anything?", asked a friend, not once, not twice, but thrice. This post is dedicated to him. Because despite being a shitty writer, he is checking my blog, whenever possible for a new post. I wish I had more friends like him. The Bloggers elite group could learn a thing or two from him, keeping aside your ego and whatnot. 


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Bangalore, Karnataka, India
| Writer | Photographer | Split Personality Disorder | Foodie | Music | Art | God-Fearing Atheist | Movies | Golf | Soccer | Dance | Mentally Stable Psychopath |